I wouldn't call myself a blogger or a writer, even though that seems to be the trendy thing to do. One glance though this and all the writers who can spot the wayward comma and misspelled words will be cringing. I might throw some in just in case, any one gets bored.
I have been thinking a lot lately about "what is the loving thing to do" (anyone that knows me well, just feel asleep, when I said that). What I mean by this is...What is the loving thing to do, when??? Your boss is an asshole. Your best friend is in another relationship where the boyfriend/girlfriend treats them like crap and you are supposed to be happy for them. When you bump into people at the store, your kids school, the coffee shop and these are the people that have hurt you the most or your friends the most. When the person who is supposed to love you, flaws and all, tells you your acne is too bad, you are too fat and points to the flaws you already know about. When nothing you do is good enough; when you can't love yourself and feel like no one else loves you. WHAT IS THE LOVING THING TO DO?
I want to say, "How the hell should I know?" and move on in blissful ignorance, but I DO KNOW what to do. I know the loving thing is not being a punching bag for another (that is not learning to love myself). I know that the LOVING thing is simple and so complex it scares me to death sometimes. I know the loving thing is... treat others how I want to be treated! O.K. don't stop reading just because you can hear your Mother or Father saying those very words to you, when you blew it growing up. Try and pull back from something that has been said WAY too much and not SHOWN by example near enough. Say it to yourself, with the kindest thoughts FOR YOU that you can think. How do I want to be treated?
We say so many things (me included) that we think are loving, these things we wouldn't say to our enemies, but we say them to are friends, partners and children. I would love you if...you were thinner, dressed better, got a job, showered more, were smarter, weren't so shy, weren't so loud, had an education, had no life before me ie. boyfriends or girlfriend, weren't such a sensitive man, weren't such a powerful woman, were more creative blah blah blah. The list goes on and on. You might be thinking, "I would never say anything like that", but you do and I do. In our body language and what we with hold; commitment, friendship, real love, companionship, our time, our lives.
Every situation is different and I don't know what loving thing to do every time, but I can look at the life of Jesus and try and imagine what He would say and what he wouldn't.
When You and Jesus run into someone that has blown it with you, what do you say or do? You do not run away, you engage and say hello (you do not do what is expected and reject). THIS DOES NOT APPLY TO PEOPLE THAT ARE UNSAFE FOR YOU TO BE AROUND NOR AM I SUGGESTING YOU SEEK PEOPLE OUT. When You and Jesus are greeted with yet another man or woman in your life that can't commit,because of your acne, or weight, or height, or strength. Try and (politely) say I'm sorry that that is an issue for you, but I am learning to love myself and am relieved you let me know what were your issues before we married and you spent lifetime trying to change me. Then You and Jesus go home and cry and realize you dodged a bullet and move on having learned.
I am not trying to be Jesus, that has been done. I am trying to be loving and this is not done enough and doesn't look the same twice. I will fail and hopefully learn and get back up and try it again.